Separated Parents

Separation is a difficult process, especially when children are involved. Our mediation service provides a neutral and structured space for separated parents to discuss childcare arrangements and financial matters, helping to avoid legal battles and reduce conflict.

Guiding separated parents towards better communication and resolution.

Supporting separated parents

Separating parents often face numerous issues that can make the process emotionally and logistically challenging:

Family mediation will support discussions focused on their children and can also support finance mediation.

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The Separated Parents Process

  • Mediation Information & Assessment Meeting (MIAM)

    A MIAM (Mediation Information and Assessment Meeting) is the first step before family mediation. It’s a confidential meeting with a trained mediator, usually lasting about an hour. The mediator will explain how mediation works, answer your questions, and listen to what’s happening for you. It’s your chance to talk about your situation and see whether mediation could be helpful.

    In England and Wales, the law asks you to attend a MIAM before you can make certain applications to the family court (such as about children or finances). The idea is to give you space to explore your options before going down the court route. Even if you don’t go on to mediation, attending a MIAM means you’ve had the chance to consider all the choices available to you.

    Mediation works when you and the other person both decide to go ahead, and the next step is your mediation sessions. These are safe, structured conversations where the mediator helps you both talk things through calmly. You can cover child arrangements, financial issues, or both. The mediator doesn’t take sides or make decisions — their role is to support you in finding solutions that work for everyone. Any agreements you make can be written up, and if you wish, turned into something legally binding.

    Couple reviewing documents with mediator during family financial mediation session
  • What Documents Will I Receive After Mediation?

    At the end of your mediation process, you will receive written documents that clearly set out the decisions and agreements you have reached. These are designed to give you a clear record of what has been discussed and agreed, which you can then take forward for legal advice or formalisation if you wish.

    Memorandum of Understanding (MOU)

    This document records all the agreements reached during your mediation sessions.
    It is written in plain language and provides a clear summary of your joint decisions.
    While it is not legally binding, it can be taken to a solicitor who can help turn it into a legally binding document, such as a Consent Order.

    Open Financial Statement (for financial mediation)

    If you are mediating financial matters, you will also receive an Open Financial Statement.
    This document sets out a clear picture of your financial information, such as assets, debts, income, and expenses, as disclosed during mediation.
    It is called “open” because it can be shared openly with solicitors and the court if needed.

    Together, these documents provide both the detail of your financial disclosure and a clear record of the agreements you have made, giving you a strong foundation to move forward.

    Mediation can be arranged where you are both in the same mediation with the mediator present at all times.  You can also have ‘shuttle’ mediation where you are in separate rooms and the mediator will come and go between both of you to support the mediation discussions.

    You will be signposted to speak to a Solicitor to ensure you are aware of your legal rights and responsibilities. This will support your discussions in mediation.

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Family Mediation is built on key principles:

Voluntary

It is voluntary, meaning no one is forced to take part

Confidential

It is confidential, so discussions stay private (except in very limited circumstances, such as safeguarding concerns)

Neutral mediator

It is led by a neutral mediator, who does not take sides or make decisions for you.

Open and respectful

Mediation focuses on open and respectful communication, helping families work together to find fair and practical solutions

Child-centred

It is child-centred, encouraging parents to put the needs and wellbeing of their children first when making arrangements for the future

Future-focused

It is future-focused, meaning you are supported to reach agreements that will support your family situation in the days and months ahead.

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How Family Mediation Helps Parents and Couples

Family mediation gives parents and separating couples a safe space to talk through the things that matter most — whether that’s making arrangements for children or sorting out financial matters. With the help of a neutral mediator, you can have constructive conversations about where the children will live, how much time they’ll spend with each parent, and how you’ll manage ongoing parenting responsibilities.

Family Mediation also provides an opportunity to discuss financial issues, such as property, savings, or ongoing support, in a way that feels fair and practical. The aim is to help you reach agreements together, reduce conflict, and create a plan that works for your family’s future

Why choose mediation?

Mediation is designed to make a difficult time a little easier.

It’s usually:

Better for children – helping parents work together positively.
Quicker and less stressful than going to court.
More affordable than lengthy legal battles.
Flexible – you decide what to discuss and when.
Empowering – you stay in control of the outcome.

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Supporting parents through child-focused mediation.

Helping parents navigate

These issues highlight the need for structured support, such as mediation services, to help separating parents navigate these challenges and prioritise their children’s wellbeing.

Communication Breakdown

Parents may struggle to maintain effective communication, leading to misunderstandings and increased conflict.

Emotional Distress

Both parents and children experience a range of emotions, including grief, anxiety, and fear of abandonment.

Co-parenting challenges

Developing a new co-parenting relationship while managing personal differences can be difficult.

Financial strain

Determining fair child maintenance and dividing assets can cause significant stress.

Child wellbeing concerns

Parents worry about their children’s mental health, behaviour, and adjustment to the new family dynamic.

Scheduling conflicts

Arranging childcare, visitation, and shared responsibilities can be complex and contentious.

Differing parenting styles

Disagreements over discipline, rules, and routines can lead to inconsistency and conflict.

Legal complexities

Navigating the legal aspects of separation, especially regarding child custody and financial arrangements, can be overwhelming.

Emotional manipulation

In some cases, one parent may use the children or financial matters as a means of control or retaliation.

Transitional anxiety

Children may exhibit challenging behaviours during handovers between parents, causing additional stress.

Balancing personal healing with parental responsibilities

Parents must manage their own emotional recovery while supporting their children through the transition.

  • Supporting Child-Focused Co-Parenting

    Family Mediation

    Core Benefits

    • Creating a Structured Environment: A neutral space to discuss parenting arrangements without conflict.
    • Developing a Comprehensive Parenting Plan: Covering care arrangements, holidays, celebrations, and co-parenting strategies.
    • Improving Communication: Mediators guide parents in maintaining effective, child-focused discussions.
    • Prioritising Children’s Needs: Encouraging decisions that ensure stability and security.
    • Facilitating Child Involvement: Including children’s perspectives in a way that supports their wellbeing.
    • Addressing Financial Matters: Helping parents agree on child maintenance and support.
    • Promoting Cooperation: Fostering a collaborative approach to decision-making.
    • Providing Expert Guidance: Mediators offer solutions based on family dynamics and child psychology.
    • Ensuring Flexibility & Adaptability: Parenting plans can be modified as circumstances evolve.
    • Reducing Conflict: Encouraging constructive dialogue to create a harmonious co-parenting relationship.
  • Helping Parents Navigate Financial Separation

    Finance Mediation

    Financial Support Areas

    • Financial Disclosure – Ensuring full transparency on income, assets, savings, and debts.
    • Assessing Needs – Evaluating housing, living expenses, and children’s financial requirements.
    • Division Options – Exploring fair asset division methods, including property, pensions, and investments.
    • Child Maintenance – Clarifying Child Maintenance Service calculations and additional costs.
    • Legal Processes – Explaining mediation as a first step and legal pathways for formal agreements.
    • Long-term Considerations – Discussing tax implications, financial planning, and clean break settlements.

Family Mediation Voucher Scheme – £500 Support Available in England & Wales

Get up to £500 towards the cost of family mediation to help resolve child arrangement disputes without going to court.

The Ministry of Justice (MOJ) Voucher Scheme provides eligible families with a one-off contribution of up to £500 towards mediation costs, helping parents resolve disputes about child arrangements and related financial matters outside of court.

To qualify, your case must involve:
✔ A dispute or application regarding a child under 18. 
✔ A financial dispute linked to a child arrangement case.

  • Not means-tested – Available regardless of income, number of children, or financial status.

  • One voucher per family/case (not per individual).

  • Does not cover the MIAM (Mediation Information & Assessment Meeting).

  • Eligibility is assessed by an accredited Family Mediation Council (FMC) mediator.

  • The mediator applies on your behalf, and the payment goes directly to them.

Find Out If You’re Eligible for the Voucher Scheme

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Testimonials

“Thank you for such a great experience. You were really superb and I’m very glad I was lucky enough to meet you.”

“Davina has a lovely calming manner.  She has the ability to make you feel completely relaxed.  She is very professional in her approach, but manages to be light hearted and fun.  I felt comfortable with her and knew I was in good hands.  She also has the most gentle, lilting voice which put me at ease immediately.”

“Thank you for the encouragement and positive feedback – I hardly recognise myself!”

“Thank you so much, I am just delighted.  I thoroughly enjoyed the course and this was aided by learning massively from you (you made it look easy). “

“Thank you for your help in making 2022 end so much better than it started for our family. You certainly helped our family navigate a very difficult time”

As a parent, we had the opportunity through mediation to understand each other better. We were able to speak openly and feel genuinely heard, which made a real difference. It was particularly helpful not being interrupted, as it allowed us both the time and space to express our views more clearly and calmly.

We sat down for about an hour and it was really useful and positive. We were able to come to a good agreement, which felt like real progress. Thank you so much for your time, Davina. I really appreciated it, and believe it or not, even in that short session I learnt a lot that I was able to take into my conversation with my ex-partner.

“I feel lighter, I can see there is light at the end of the tunnel.”

“I felt like you were very supportive today with myself and (mother) in our mediation session today.”

“Thank you so much for your time over the last couple of sessions. I do feel that we have made real progress and got somewhere positive through the process. You listened to us, and I really felt that my voice was heard during the discussions. It made a real difference to feel understood and included throughout the process.”

“I found the experience really valuable. I was able to speak openly without being interrupted, which helped me feel comfortable and not at all intimidated. Having that space allowed me to properly process the discussions at my own pace, and as a result, I came away with much greater clarity about the situation.”

“I really appreciate the support provided during the mediation process. It made a real difference to how we managed our conversations, helping us stay focused on what matters. It created a more balanced environment where we could communicate more successfully and work through issues together for the benefit of our children.”

“Mediation has really helped us develop a healthier way of communicating as a family. We’ve learned that we can have disagreements without things escalating, and that it’s possible to approach those moments more calmly and constructively. It has also encouraged us to involve our teenager by listening to her perspective, while still having the space as parents to work through important decisions together during mediation.”

“We’ve made real progress through mediation, moving away from a defensive mindset to a more balanced, middle ground. We’re now able to share information about our children openly, keep each other updated, and have conversations that feel calm and comfortable. Importantly, we can let each other speak without interruption and keep the focus where it belongs—on our children and what’s best for them.”

“I feel we are now moving towards the same goal without the worry or hesitation we once had. We’re working together much more effectively for the sake of our children. I recognise that there is still trust and confidence to build, but I’m committed to honouring our agreements and continuing to make progress so we can move forward in a positive and cooperative way.”

“Davina really took the time to listen to me and never made me feel rushed, allowing me to speak fully at my own pace. She was fair to both of us and helped us gain a clear understanding of what the mediation sessions would involve. She also made it clear how we would be supported throughout, including the option to take breaks if things became emotional, which helped us feel more at ease going into the process.”

“As a parent, I can say it has been worth using mediation. We have actually got somewhere in our conversations and found a new way of communicating. We’ve been able to reach agreements because we listened to each other and shared our points of view. Davina helped keep us focused throughout, which made a real difference in helping us move forward with our situation. I feel more comfortable moving forward now.”

“Mediation has been for the best for our family. We don’t need the conflict or ‘wars’ between us, especially as we have a 15-year-old who we both need to support. Having a third person present made a real difference, as it helped us stay more amicable with each other. The mediation process brought out the better side of us, allowing us to focus on what really matters for our child.”

“I would just like to say I had negative thoughts about the whole process before going into it. There is a lot of stereotypical talk about the process. After the experience I want to say this is not correct. I was made to feel comfortable and also heard, which was a massive thing for me. The child in question was always at the front of the conversation and was put first. It was a relaxing environment and was always monitored if it was getting off topic. I can’t thank you enough for the experience and how relaxed and heard you made me feel.”